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New 1000M Rifle Prone Olympic Champion!

Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 4:01 am
by conradin
Our bear Orso Discordia winning the Gold Medal for the 1000M Free Rifle Prone Event in the Championship. He is the first shooter to win this event since Joshua Millner 104 years ago. Representing Bearistan, sponsored by Bearmann, holding his German Copy Bearistan Rifle, and showing off his Gold Medal and his target! He is the first bear from Bearistan to win any shooting medals!

After receiving his Gold Medal from Borat and listening to Bearistan's national anthem Трололо, he has tears in his little glassy eyes.

Bear said during the press conference :

"переделывали соответствующие образы, пассажи и выражения «Слова», применяя их к рассказу о победе русских войск над татарами за Доном на Куликовом поле. Все шесть ныне известных списков «Задонщины» дают крайне искаженный текст, и точное восстановление первоначального вида произведения"

"I am so very proud to be the first bear to win any shooting contest, as opposed to being shot at.... now I am going back home for my day job as a garbage dump food searcher....can I exchange the Gold Medal for honey instead??"


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Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 4:16 am
by Spencer
How did Discordia find the new 27-shot Finals format?
Speaking to Phascolarctos Cinereus (our local representative in the event), Cine found the 5kg limit on ammunition on the flight to the event meant that he ran out of ammunition and he would have liked to be able to fire all 27 shots.

Posted: Thu Sep 20, 2012 12:28 am
by KatoomDownUnder
Spencer wrote:How did Discordia find the new 27-shot Finals format?
Speaking to Phascolarctos Cinereus (our local representative in the event), Cine found the 5kg limit on ammunition on the flight to the event meant that he ran out of ammunition and he would have liked to be able to fire all 27 shots.
I'm surprised Cine was even awake and even more curious as to how the anti-doping people reacted to the elevated levels of eucalyptus in his system, mind you for Cine it would be far from a performance enhancement.

Posted: Thu Sep 20, 2012 3:59 am
by Joakim
I'm surprised Cine was even awake and even more curious as to how the anti-doping people reacted to the elevated levels of eucalyptus in his system, mind you for Cine it would be far from a performance enhancement.
Considering this, I think it's rather astonishing that he even managed to win the national koalification event.

Posted: Thu Sep 20, 2012 8:53 am
by Spencer
KatoomDownUnder wrote:...I'm surprised Cine was even awake and even more curious as to how the anti-doping people reacted to the elevated levels of eucalyptus in his system, mind you for Cine it would be far from a performance enhancement.
Any suggestion that eucalyptus oil is a maskng agent is unproven and scurrilous!
Joakim wrote:...Considering this, I think it's rather astonishing that he even managed to win the national koalification event.
The mix-up with the scores at the trials event was resolved to the satisfaction of all concerned - Cine was probably the best shooter and probably had a PB on the day.

Posted: Thu Sep 20, 2012 9:48 pm
by xtreme
But will he pass the trouser rules?
He doesn't have any.

How much can we bear

Posted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 2:04 am
by KatoomDownUnder
Apparently the Peruvian entrant got lost at a London railway station.

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Posted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 12:05 pm
by conradin
The Chinese representative 大熊猫 (Ailuropoda Melanoleuca) withdrew in protest. The Chinese coach explained in a press conference:

"教育局局長吳克儉說,該局向學校發出通函,闡述有關推行德育及國民教育科政策的修訂詳情,並將「德育及國民教育科支援津貼」,改 「德育及國民教育支援津貼」,學校可以靈活運用53萬元津貼,以支援優化有關教育的工作。"

"If others can take Eucalyptus, honey, and Red Bull, why was bamboo banned during the competition? This is discrimination!"

ISSF describes the matter as an ongoing investigation and announced that the legitimacy of bamboo is a delicate matter.

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